I know by just the title, you will be like, “Arghh, it is going to be like one of those long boring inspirational readings that do not seem to help.” I used to react likewise, but when I was at my worst moments, I found value in these readings and Ted Talks. So, I will still share what I have learned, what helped and leave it here. Whenever you need a little bit of motivation or encouragement - this will be here for you.
What is motivation?
Let’s begin with defining motivation. Motivation “is a need and desire that energizes behavior and directs it toward a goal” (Myers, 443). In addition, there are two types - intrinsic and extrinsic. Intrinsic motivation describes “the desire to perform a behavior effectively and for its own sake” (Myers, 312). You are being motivated from the inside, from your heart and passion. While extrinsic motivation explains that we have the desire to “behave in certain ways to receive external rewards or avoid threatened punishment” (Myers, 312). Typically, extrinsic motivation exists subconsciously every day; this explains why we go to lecture, do homework, or go to work because in return we get the grades and paychecks we yearn for.
I know the textbook definition is pretty obvious; however, it is important to understand and identify your motivation to plan, try, and change your motivation, which I will explain next.
Plan, Try, and Change
After you have identified your goal, especially when it is something fresh and new, you will feel the excitement and, at that very moment, “motivated” to reach that goal. This is where you plan out your steps to reach your goal. Then you give it a try…this is where things get a little messy. While trying it out, you make more discoveries that can affect how motivated you feel; if you encounter something new that interests you, your motivation is further boosted. In contrast, if you realize that your goal is no longer achievable, your motivation tends to diminish. This is why it is so difficult to stay motivated because we do encounter obstacles, changes, and burnout points.
This is where I want to emphasize with you: IT IS OKAY TO MAKE CHANGES!
Well, I do not know if this ever happens to you, but I know even when making changes, I have a difficult time because the little voice inside my head repeatedly whispers, “Oh, if I make a change, then does it mean I did not try hard enough since I was so passionate about it?” Well, here is the thing - passion can change. We always have to consider our ability and the long-term effects. Most importantly, learn how to stop the discouraging self-talk; instead, learn to reinforce yourself positively. Negative thoughts create a sense of insecurity; it feels like you are being judged or not good enough - these are thoughts you want to avoid. When you can tell yourself what you should do, get over criticism, and continue the process of planning, trying, and maybe changing, you are keeping yourself motivated.
Of course, I understand it is easier said than done, but I discovered that the best way to get over criticism or judgments is to tell myself, “At the end of the day, no one cares about what [I] do.” I get it, you might say my parents, my family, or people around you care. I would say people who actually care are concerned about your success and happiness; therefore, if you can show them your definition of success and that you will be happy, they will be okay with it. They might be upset and mad at first with your changes, but soon they will understand seeing you being your best self.
Well, if you feel like that was not enough, here is a bit of my story. I recently changed majors, it was sudden, and I did not discuss it with my parents first. I met with several advisors, discussed it, got everything done, then I told my parents. I could tell that they were not happy because I was extremely passionate about my previous major, everyone knew, from my high school teachers to friends. At first, I was scared of judgment. I did not know how they would react to my change. They might even think I did not try hard enough. At the same time, I convinced myself that I knew my previous major would not be suitable for me in the long run, I knew because it started feeling like the wrong fit for me. In the end, I managed to share with my parents about the new change. Now that they can see I am adjusting to my new path, they are less upset with my decision.
I also hope through my story you can see why always keeping your motivation firing is so crucial because it affects your emotions and what you hope to convey. Honestly, you do not have to prove yourself to anyone either because at the end of the day - your life is about you; your life is a story for you to write, edit, and change.
Yes, “change” is redundant throughout my writing because I want it to be the emphasis. To stay motivated, you have to remember that changes are totally alright. Here is a plus, as mentioned, we tend to be more excited when something is new because we are curious. Therefore, you are restarting and refreshing your motivation by making a change. You are keeping it going instead of stopping it. Think of your laptop, once you stop it/power off, it is hard to find a comeback. You can choose to turn it off completely, but when you decide to restart, it comes on eventually, similar to keeping your motivation going instead of diminishing it completely.
Lastly, reward yourself after every small accomplishment; whether it is good food, good talks, a trip, a new item, or a concert - treat yourself. The little rewards assure you are doing great and ensure you are on track to accomplish your goal. This makes sure you are not wasting time because changing and retrying is better than stopping and wasting time as you can not make up for the time that has been lost.
Work Cited
Myers, David G. Psychology. 2008.
Commenti